All the sugar was in the bottom of the cup
by idontlikebreadcrusts
Summary: "Your brother is going to kill me." Sasuke clicked his tongue in annoyance, "Don't be ridiculous." That statement was probably true though. Itachi would be livid when he found out. Trigger Warning: Harsh depictions of violence happen in this story.


Quick AN: This fic does have mentions of Neji/Hinata pairing, if you are not into that then just read a different story. Otherwise, enjoy!

* * *

Sasuke needed a moment to process this. He blinked up at the ceiling, observing the smooth surface above his head. Had it always been that white?

_"Sasuke?" _

His eyes trailed back down to the open text and notebook, highlighting the important parts for his upcoming biochemistry exam. Funny, he didn't realize just how many pens and markers he used when studying before. It was really quite an impressive handful.

_"Sasuke?" _

"How did she find out?" Ah, there it was. He finally managed to find his voice again, brain making its proper connections with his mouth.

He heard a heavy sigh on the line, it sounded tired, defeated and heavy. _ "She found my card statements, saw that I've been purchasing an extra set of flight tickets on occasions. The amount of expenses you make on a monthly basis and the ones made on our last trip also gave her the general idea of what's been going on." _

His favorite pen twirled absently in pale fingers as Kakashi explained. What shit luck.

"Does she know it's me?" Not really prepared to deal with a wrathful wife at the moment, maybe she'd be considerate enough to wait until after finals before demanding his blood.

"_No. She, uh… she's convinced it's another woman. A co-worker or something." _ The older man snorted out over the line.

Typical. Well that was good news at least. He still couldn't help rolling his eyes as he responded, "I see. I take it the truth will follow you to your grave?"

"_Sasuke, I'm already in huge trouble with my wife. I am not looking to add gasoline to the fire here. Besides, the less she knows the better I can protect you from getting involved in all of this. She won't let it go if she finds out it was you, she'll make your life a living hell." _

Unfortunately he wasn't lying about that part. She was one crazy woman he did not want to deal with. "Yeah, I understand."

"_I'm sorry it has to end this way. I really am going to miss you." _

Sasuke frowned and reminded himself to remain somewhat professional. "Thank you for everything. I really would be in deep shit without you. I wouldn't have been able to stay in school this long if it hadn't have been for your generosity." A truthful statement.

"_Don't worry too much about it Sasuke. You're a smart boy, you'll find a way if you decide to take a break." _

Sasuke said his final goodbye and forcefully tapped on the little red icon to end the call, head falling to his desk with a heavy thud. "Ow."

Damn it. He pushed down the disappointment and hurt that threatened to well up in his chest and let out a frustrated sigh as he realized he would have to ask for advice. Now what? Sugar daddy's like Kakashi were rare enough as it is. He was a filthy rich businessman, handsome for his age, a perfect gentleman in character where it mattered, a personality that could definitely handle Sasuke and their arrangement had been long term. Most potentials Sasuke had come across before him were cheap, creepy, boring, horrendously unattractive, and the arrangements lasted only a few months at best. On top of that finding one that was looking for a male sugar baby was a huge challenge in itself. Sasuke was pretty sure he could kiss his education goodbye now. He was lucky to have been in that arrangement for so long. Almost two years and the fucking old man had to go and get himself caught.

He picked his head back up off his desk and typed out a quick text, shutting his book as his studying was now ruined by the developing predicament. The screen lit up with a response and the Uchiha grabbed a sweatshirt as he ran out the door. There was only one other person who he could trust to give him a unbiased and straight forward opinion, only one other person that knew about Kakashi and was trusted to be sworn to secrecy. Luckily said person was a creature of habit and currently occupying his designated booth at the diner across the street from the campus.

The bell on the door chimed as he walked in and made a beeline over to a familiar figure playing chess with himself. Sasuke slid into the seat opposite of him, gliding over the retro vinyl and waited patiently for his presence to be acknowledged by either the other booth occupant or the wait staff. Whichever came first really.

"What can I get for you dear?"

It was the server who spoke to him first today.

"Coffee and a water, please."

She took his order and left. It was another moment before the man across from him spoke, "Troubles with your benefactor?"

"What gave it away?" He always knew the gist of his problems before Sasuke even said anything.

"What you're wearing. You wore it two days ago, you never wear the same thing in a month much less a single week. If I remember correctly, that particular sweatshirt was gifted to you specifically by your patron. Meaning you subconsciously grabbed it in some sort of effort to connect with him which hints that you wish to seek comfort, which you normally don't show so blatantly, or he is at the forefront of your thoughts and thus the source of your upset state. That plus your random text and the fact that you ordered caffeine indicates you are in some state of immediate stress."

Sasuke tugged at his sleeves, glaring at the chessboard on the table. "Ok, well can I ask for your thoughts then about what's going on."

"Duh, I doubt anyone else would give you solid advice on the matter." His only friend scoffed as he moved a rook over a few spaces and captured an opposing bishop.

"His wife found out." Sasuke blurted after a moment figuring he should just get to the point.

Shikamaru finally looked up at the Uchiha, brows mildly raised with interest. "Interesting. She went through his phone or found his bank information?"

"Credit card statement."

"You'd figure he'd be more careful by now." his friend mused.

Sasuke grumbled lightly in agreement as he sipped the dark steaming beverage. He wondered how fast he would have to drink the coffee in order for it to scorch his throat and take his mind off his current misery.

"He didn't tell her about me, I mean that he was cheating on her with a man. He just let her assume it was another woman who worked with him. I don't know if I should be offended by that or grateful."

"Do you feel offended?" Shikamaru turned his attention back to the board in front of him.

"A little." A lot, he admitted more to himself.

"Do you feel grateful?"

Sasuke slowly stirred his coffee just to give himself something to do. "Kind of."

"Then why not a bit of both. You had a relationship with him for almost two years, and even though you knew it wasn't permanent and it did heavily rely on money and sex, you two did enjoy each others company. It's ok to be upset about this. Even you are allowed to feel a range of mixed emotions, Sasuke."

"There are days where I hate that you're a psychology major. You know that?"

The man across the table laughed lightly, "Yet you still always want my advice."

"Yeah, yeah. So, what should I do? I'm going to take a huge hit financially. I've got enough to keep me afloat for maybe four months but not enough to pay for next semester and all the books that I need for my classes."

"What you should do is going to depend on your goals. You still want to graduate next year and be a pharmacist?" Shikamaru still had his eyes glued to the pieces in from of him as he spoke.

"Yeah"

"Well let's look at your options and decide how you can best achieve that. How much was Kakashi providing you with on a monthly basis?"

Sasuke blushed for a moment, "Uh, everything in total or just the cash?"

"For the sake of curiosity, everything in total. All your profit."

Dark eyes shifted uncomfortably before the Uchiha spoke again. "Well I had a two thousand allowance a month, plus a credit card that I could spend a thousand a month, I tried to only used that sparingly though. There were some additional gifts and travel expenses paid whenever he wanted me to go with him on his business trips and stuff, but that depended on him. It wasn't always every month."

Shikamaru raised one brow but didn't comment on the amounts. Instead he continued the conversation. "Ok, let's just count the allowance and the credit card since that was a fixed amount every month. What would you normally use that money for?"

"Everything. My rent, car, gas, groceries, cell phone, utilities, loans and tuition, textbooks and school supplies..." Sasuke rattled off his list of expenses. "I would put a portion of it into savings. I'm not completely broke and I do have that part time job at the library still but that pays only about eight dollars the hour for a measly twenty hours a week. I don't even make a thousand a month with that job. I'd have to take out more student loans for the next semester, unless I give back my car and find another junker like last time. That'll only save me like three hundred a month though and I'll have less reliable transportation and less in my savings."

Sasuke let his head fall into the table as he grumbled on about not wanting to give up his one bedroom apartment or his car with a working AC.

Shikamaru hummed in thought. "Well, you've got four options right now. Three of them have your end goal in mind."

"And they are?"

"One, drop out of school and try to land some full time job that hopefully is enough for you to pay your shit." Shikamaru held his finger out as he began counting.

"Dislike" Sasuke rolled his eyes in annoyance that his friend would even suggest that. He wouldn't even be trying to continue his education at that point.

"Two, get another regular part time job along with your current one and rely on student loans to keep you going but risk increasing your debt and spend years paying it off."

The Uchiha shrugged, "I mean, if I have to. I'd rather not."

"Hey man, it's what I'm doing. We all can't be sugar babies."

Oh yeah, that was true. He pushed his friend to continue, "Next option."

"You keep on hustling and try to find a new guy who can help financially support you."

He inhaled, that would be the best thing since he had gotten pretty good at it. But it wasn't that easy, sugaring was a lot of work in its own.

"Maybe, but that's easier said than done. I don't exactly have a ton of potentials for me to choose from. Kakashi was a happy accident, if he hadn't been introduced by my brother I would have been stuck with guys like Orochimaru as my only options."

Shika frowned slightly and nodded, "Yeah, that guy was weird. Ok, last and most reasonable option, which means you will absolutely hate it. You move in with Itachi."

"No way. That's not even an option." Nope. Never in a million years.

Here came the voice of reason, "Your brother loves you. He'd gladly help you out if you would set your pride aside and ask him."

"Yeah, that's not going to happen."

"Well that's all you've got to decide from." Shikamaru shrugged and went back to his game as Sasuke scowled at nothing in particular. Leave it to Shikamaru to put things in perspective.

Well, he did have a point. Itachi wouldn't even ask questions, just happily set him up in the spare room and help him pay his tuition. Sasuke mulled it over, he did care about his older brother and he knew Itachi was nothing like his parents. But then moving in with him and asking for help, that would be giving in. He couldn't just give in that easily. He didn't want anything to do with the their money, that was how they manipulated people. That was how his dad was trying to control him, if they were paying for college and his every need, Sasuke had to study what his father wanted and do everything his mother said.

The day Sasuke turned eighteen he left home first thing in the morning. His parents had no more control over him, what friends he could have, what annoying girls from prestigious families he had to date to keep up appearances of a normal hetero son. He didn't have to listen to how short he fell in comparison to his brother anymore. He didn't have to go to get his degree in business and work for the family company like they told him to. The day he set foot out of that house was the happiest day of his life. It was also the most sobering. Paying for shit with a minimum wage job sucked, buying the cheapest car you could find on craigslist sucked, applying for student loans sucked, living out of your car for months sucked.

Itachi was the only one who checked in on a regular basis. Making sure he was still breathing at least, and every time Sasuke refused to accept any type of money or help from his brother. He had to do this on his own. He had to prove it to his parents. He had to prove it to himself. He could do this without the family money.

"I guess I'll go with option two while I figure out how I'm going to make option three work."

Shikamaru leaned back and smiled, "I mean student loans aren't the end of the world. They just follow you forever until you pay them off or die."

"Hn. It's like an unfortunate fashion trend, everyone seems to have them these days." Sasuke waved the server over so he could order a meal now that he was done stressing over what he should do.

"Ah yes, I forgot. You hate anything mainstream."

X_X

Sasuke scrolled through various profiles on the site. None of them looked promising. To be honest none of them were looking for what he had to offer anyway. He frowned as a familiar face rolled past his screen. There was already a message from him in Sasuke's inbox the day he returned to the site. It still sat there, unread. He was not particularly interested in an arrangement with Orochimaru. Not even after two and a half months of searching and coming up dry would tempt him to reach out to the man. It's not that he wasn't rich, the guy was practically a walking gold mine. He wasn't extremely ugly or rude either. No, the man seemed perfectly normal if a little eccentric in terms of looks. It was more of the fact that he seemed extremely clingy, particularly with Sasuke. Even Shikamaru agreed he got a creepy vibe. Either way there was something telling the Uchiha to not engage and Sasuke had no reason not to trust his intuition at this point.

He dropped his phone back onto the mattress and turned over with a groan. It was times like this that he really missed Kakashi. Nonetheless he had to remind himself not to dwell on something that was over and done with. Sasuke had managed to hang in there so far. He had gotten a second job overnight stocking at the grocery store. It had left him exhausted and the damn muscle he must have pulled in his side lifting boxes had been hurting for days already. He wrapped himself up in the blanket tighter and sighed. His stomach was bothering him too, he hadn't been hungry much and any attempts at eating just made him throw it all back up. His body was probably having a meltdown thanks to all the added stress in his life. Finals were in two months and it was looking more and more like he would have to sell the rest of his soul to more student debt so he could get his degree. Living the American dream.

The alarm on his phone went off signaling that he needed to get ready for his shift at the library. Begrudgingly he rose from the bed and dressed, ran a comb through his hair before deciding there was no energy for dealing with that right now and gave up. He just grabbed a beanie and stuffed it on his head. A hand fished around for the bottle of aspirin that had found a new home in Sasuke's backpack, he downed two tablets before tossing it back in and heading to work. Thankfully it was a Sunday. That meant there weren't many students on campus and his shift would be quiet. He could spend most of the time studying. He smiled at that small bit of good luck, which was wiped off his face the minute he walked into the building. Wait, no. He was working with Suigetsu today. He wouldn't be able to concentrate too much with his co-workers inability to stay quiet for more than a minute.

"Hey, Sasuke." Speak of the devil.

Sasuke nodded a silent greeting and set his things down behind the circulation desk to clock in.

He didn't even bother to pull his books out of his bag, there was no point. Suigetsu had already begun to tell him all about his crazy weekend and Sasuke was trying hard to drone the voice out. He rested his head on the desk and drew his jacket closer around him. Someone must have lowered the air in the library, chills coursed down his body. He rolled his head so that his cheek now pressed flat against the cool surface and fixed his stare at something past the man sitting next to him. The discomfort in his side seemed to just cut into him every time he breathed, that aspirin wasn't working anymore. He probably should get it checked. Or maybe try taking a muscle relaxer? He didn't have money waste on a doctor's visit and medication. He'd probably have to find a roommate in the next few weeks if he wanted to stay on top of his rent. He grimaced at the thought of having to live in close proximity with someone else. How long would it take before Sasuke strangled them? Maybe he'd die first from this damned aching in his body.

"You don't look so good. Are you alright?"

Sasuke was brought back to the present by Suigetsu invading his personal space, an outreached finger pushed against the Uchihas forehead. "Remove your finger from my face."

"Dude, you've got one hell of a fever. Maybe you should go home?" Dark violet eyes watched with concern.

He was beginning to feel like a truck hit him and then proceeded to reverse back over him repeatedly. Of course Sasuke was a stubborn fucker and ignored the comment. He could power through it.

The Uchiha stood and grabbed the cart of books to be reshelved. "I'm putting these away."

To be fair it was rather impressive that Sasuke managed to last thirty minutes before the aching turned into a sharp unbearable pain and he crumpled to the floor knocking over several stacks of books. At first it was pretty quiet and he lay there dizzy and groaning in pain wondering if this was really how it was going to end. In a fucking library of all places. Then somewhere above him there was the sound of someone gasping and running, more noise and Sasuke sort of lost track of what was happening as his insides felt like they were being stabbed with a thousand needles and then ripped apart. He did not need this right now.

Words like 'ambulance' and 'hospital' were being thrown around but the man on the floor was a little too busy writhing in pain to pay much attention to the small crowd of people that had gathered around him. He barely recognized being moved into a vehicle and it wasn't until that sterile smell hit him he realized where he was. He panicked at the sight of the walls that now surrounded him and the various people in scrubs running back and forth. Dark hair stuck to his head from the sweat of the fever and his breathing hitched as a new wave of pain shot through him. How did this happen? Why was he in a hospital with so many strangers and sharp things around. His body was screaming in panic and pain. How did he end up here?

Nobody was really paying attention to him yet, maybe he could slip away unnoticed. Then the logical part of his brain kicked in and served as a reminder of why he was in the hospital in the first place. There was something wrong with him and he needed to be here. It still didn't help any when the nurse finally came over to him with a massive IV needle and reached for his hand. He kicked out and nearly knocked the man to the floor.

"What the hell are you going to do to me?" he growled from the bed, speaking leaving him winded as he clutched again at his lower abdomen.

The nurse gave a tired sigh, "Look, we aren't going to hurt you. You need emergency surgery and I've got to get this IV in you."

Sasuke's look was locked on defiant. Wait, Surgery?! What the fuck was going on?

"We don't have to save you. Your choice entirely." The man waited, exasperated expression on his face.

A new wave of pain came over Sasuke before he could respond and he gasped out pressing his hands to the source of agony. "Fuck!"

"We can't wait much longer kid, you're in serious trouble. C'mon now."

Reluctantly, he held his hand out before his body involuntarily thrashed at the now unbearable pain and he cried out.

"Restrain him."

He fought against his revolting body valiantly, well as valiantly as a sweaty panicked college kid in a hospital gown could. The last thing he remembered was a mask forced over his face before he passed out.

X_X

Cold. Everything felt very cold.

Sasuke slowly shifted and a dull pressure made itself known on his lower right side. He was laying in something uncomfortable and his skin felt like ice. Eyelids sat heavily, unwilling to open and the stench of sharp antiseptic clung to everything around him. It felt like ages before he was able to win the fight against his body and he drowsily blinked at the dark room. It was another while before the confusion cleared and his brain reminded him he was in the hospital because, well, pain. He shakily removed the blanket and swung his legs over the side of the bed as the stinging in his hand reminded him that the damned IV was still lodged into him.

"Fuck" He examined it, trying to figure out if he should remove it when a voice made him nearly jump a foot in the air.

"And just where do you think you're going?" An older woman stood at the door with a disapproving look etched onto her face.

Sasuke schooled his face back into a scowl and lied through his teeth."I have to use the restroom."

"Sure you do." She sighed and turned on the light to the bathroom before walking over to properly detach the tube from its feed while leaving the needle still in her patient.

The Uchiha locked the bathroom door behind him and rested back against it for a moment. Of all the fucking shit he could be going through, being in the hospital was really close to the last thing he needed to be experiencing right now. He didn't even want to think about how much the bill for all of this was going to be. He had to pull himself together, he was not allowed to fall apart, not here. He turned to the mirror and lifted the thin cotton gown to reveal a large gauze bandage over what he assumed was a stitched up incision on his lower stomach. He grimaced bitterly at it, like his glare and sour attitude could fix things. He knew it wouldn't. His body felt sore as he moved to relieve himself and then to the sink to wash up. He stared at himself for a moment, fully taking in just how shitty he looked.

A knock on the door broke the silence, "You need help in there kid?"

Sasuke gave a heavy sigh, "Not unless your definition of help is paying for my hospital bill."

He opened the door to find the woman unamused with his quip. She guided him back to the bed and reattached the IV again. "Leave it in. You need the fluids and pain medication right now."

He grumbled in response but defeatedly sat back and stared out the window at nothing in particular. A heavy weight in his lap redirected his attention as she brought out a large blanket and spread it out over him. Her mouth was still in a terse line but she took care in updating the chart at the end of his bed and filling out the whiteboard with the staff information.

"I'm Shizune, I'll be the nurse on call. Dr. Senju said you gave her team a bit of a hard time." She glanced over at her patient who gave no comment.

"Well, they removed your appendix. It had ruptured badly and they very well saved your life so, I can understand that you might not want to be here right now but at least you're alive." She picked up the chart once again and flipped over a few pages. "You have any emergency contacts? We didn't find any on file and your employers said you didn't provide any to them."

"No." Sasuke lied again. Itachi would make a big deal about this, he sure as hell couldn't ask his parents for help and the thought of having anyone else over trying to talk to him right now gave him a headache. "I don't have anyone to contact."

The nurse blinked at him for a moment before scribbling down a note and returning the chart to its place. "Alright. You can push the button to call for me if you need anything. They'll bring you some food in a bit."

She left and Sasuke welcomed the silence. It gave him time to think, to create a plan of action. Try to figure out just how he was going to manage to make it through in the next few months now that all of this had taken place. Part of him knew he should probably call Itachi, at least let him know he was in the hospital. The other part of him said it was none of his business in the first place and Sasuke could take care of himself just fine without family interference. He laid back staring up at the ceiling.

He wished he could still reach out to Kakashi. It was more out of habit but he remembered that he couldn't. Not anymore,he knew that. It had been months already and the fact that he still had to remind himself annoyed him to no end. There was someone out there he could probably get help from, against his better judgement. He had to do something though. His current jobs weren't cutting it and as it is he would have to get a roommate soon. Sometimes you had to sacrifice something to get places in life right?

A light knock on the door interrupted his precious quiet as the nurse from before came in. "You're going to get a roommate soon."

"What?" He hadn't been talking outloud, how the hell would she know he was just thinking about that?

She pulled at the curtain that would separate the room in half. "They are moving a patient out of ICU so you'll have to share a room with them. It's just for one night, you should get discharged tomorrow."

"Oh." He didn't really have much of a comment on that. What could he say? He'd rather be alone in silence but life wouldn't be kind enough to grant him that anyway. At least the curtain would give him some sort of privacy.

He heard the bed roll into the room as the nurses conversed in medical lingo, making sure to get the machines and other equipment properly hooked up. It was a few minutes before the on call nurse gave the same instructions they had given Sasuke and everyone else had left the room. Silence once again, Sasuke was grateful for it. He lay back and let himself drift off to sleep hoping that would make time go faster.

X_X

Sasuke was pleased to find it was late in the evening when he woke up. They had brought him food while he was asleep and left it on the table within his reach. He sat for a moment, staring at the covered meal, quietly listening to the heavy, labored breathing of the person next to them followed by a slight mechanical hissing. The curtain that separated them was close enough that Sasuke could touch it if he leaned out just a bit further. He debated it and his curiosity finally got the best of him. He gently pulled aside the fabric to take a peek at his neighbor.

A woman with long dark hair and pale skin lay sleeping in the bed. She was connected to a ventilator but seemed unbothered by the tube that wrapped around her face. Her jaw, neck and chest were swollen in a later stage of healing. A row of gauze decorated her neck and stopped just before her collarbone. That was all he could really see as the rest of the woman was covered in blankets but something caught him off guard as he looked up. He was not expecting to find inquisitive lilac eyes watching him, with a raised brow and cold expression.

Sasuke blinked back momentarily taken back by the the man sitting in the chair, book propped open in his lap challenging the Uchiha with an unimpressed glare. There was enough small resemblance between the two that he got the feeling they were related somehow. He finally realized he should probably stop staring and go back to minding his own business after another few moments and uttered a small apology before letting the curtain fall back into place. He waited for the man to say something, reprimand him for being nosy but the comment never came and the room was silent once again.

The food was bland but Sasuke wasn't feeling all that hungry anyway. He drank some water and lay back down hoping to fall back asleep and make his hospital stay seem shorter. A few moments passed before he heard someone lightly knock and enter the room.

"Oh, Dr. Hyuga! I didn't know you stopped by." That was Shizune, her voice was soft but enough that Sasuke could hear.

The man hummed lightly, "My break is almost over, I should get going soon. Please let me know if she needs anything."

"Yes, of course. We'll take care of her. I'll let her know you stopped by when she wakes up."

He gave his thanks before the sound of his footsteps receded out the room and the nurse entered into Sasuke's area. She greeted him and asked him if he wanted something else since he hardly touched his food.

"No. Thanks but I'm just tired." Surprisingly that wasn't a lie.

She frowned a bit but nodded and took the plate away leaving him in the quiet yet again.

Funny enough, he woke up a few hours later and sleep failed to find him after that. Maybe it was the IV in his arm that didn't let him rest comfortably or the buzzing of the hospital machines that kept playing annoyingly in the background. Maybe it was the sharp sound of scissors slicing from behind the curtain or the soft rustling of paper being folded over and over again. He sighed and sat up carefully, leaning over to push the curtain out of the way. He found the woman awake this time, table moved to hover above her lap as she cut and folded various bright colored sheets of paper, oblivious to the audience she now had.

"What are you doing?" Sasuke honestly had no idea what time it was but judging by the moonlight that dimly illuminated the room, he guessed it was way to early for recreational activities.

The woman dropped the patterned paper in her hands and stared at him wide eyed, mouth shaped an a small "o" of surprise. She had the same eyes as the man earlier, soft lavender in color but hers were nowhere near as cold as his had been. He watched her grab a pencil off the flat surface and scribble on a sheet quickly before handing it over to him.

_"Sorry if I woke you." _

He glanced back up from the paper. "It's fine." He shrugged and handed the note back over to her.

She took it back, tapping the pencil on her chin in thought before adding to her initial message. She handed it back to the Uchiha who was watching with a quirked brow.

_"Hospitals make me restless at night. Origami helps keep me busy." _

She held out a small paper star in her hand and motioned for him to take it. The Uchiha stared momentarily at the item in his hand and looked back up to the woman who continued to give him a small shy smile. He returned the letter they had been passing back to her. She was odd, but at least she wasn't loud.

"I take it you can't speak?" He twirled the pale blue star in his fingers as he asked.

She shook her head apologetically and jotted down another response for him to read.

_"I'm not supposed to speak while I'm recovering." _She gestured to her throat.

"I see." He watched her fiddle with some purple paper for a moment before quickly and precisely folding it into a delicate swan.

_"Would you like to try?" _

It took many tries by the time he successfully folded a simple crane. The woman softly applauded as he set it down on his table, surrounded by failed attempts and crumpled paper. It did help the time pass faster, Sasuke noted the colors of dawn beginning to spill into the room. She had created more than a dozen pieces by now filling up a box that was once used for reams of copy paper.

"What do you do with all of them?" He watched her place the top back onto the box.

_"I send them to the pediatric ward." _ She smiled back as he read the response.

Sasuke simply nodded before handing over his crane to be added into the collection. She was rather kind, definitely someone who seemed to have the unfortunate fate of being hospitalized for how sweet of a person she seemed to be. They spent most of the time folding together in silence, a pleasant quiet that he gladly welcomed. Sasuke hadn't asked exactly what had happened to her, that was none of his business. He respected boundaries when it came to personal things like that, but now that they had nothing to keep their hands busy he felt obligated to say something, she did after all make good company.

"Someone came to see you yesterday while you were asleep."

She looked at him slightly puzzled, as if unsure who would come see her while she slept and not say anything.

"The nurse called him Dr. Hyuga."

Her face filled with instant recognition and her smile widened as she nodded, like it all made sense.

_"My cousin." _ she wrote out. _ "He's the one who takes the paper figures to the pediatric ward. He's a head doctor there." _

"Oh." He's a pediatrician? That's a fucking surprise. Sasuke had a passing thought of how many children he's made cry in his career due to his stony and callous first impression.

_"He doesn't seem like the type does he?" _

Sasuke hummed mildly in agreement.

They were interrupted by the nurses walking in on their morning rounds. "Oh Hinata, how are you feeling?"

The woman smiled and nodded politely as they checked on the charts and IV drips. Hinata was helped to the restroom as Shizune checked Sasuke's vitals and asked him the usual questions to make sure he was doing ok. There was a knock on the door and the man from yesterday entered wearing a white doctors coat.

"Come in, she's in the bathroom." the nurse absently addressed him as she updated a medical chart.

He entered and stood against the wall, out of the way eyes shut either out of exhaustion or disinterest for the people currently in the room. Maybe both.

"Alright Mr. Uchiha, you should be clear for discharge sometime after breakfast. I'll see that your paperwork gets pushed through. You sure there are no emergency contacts I can call for you? Family or a friend maybe to come pick you up?"

"No." Sasuke had already answered this question. He could get through this on his own.

The doctor frowned and outright glared at him after he had responded to the nurse. Sasuke furrowed his brow in confusion at what he ever did to deserve that look from the man but challenged him right back with a scowl.

Hinata returned to her bed shortly and excitedly smiled at her cousin. His expression softened slightly at the sight of her but he quickly hid it from Sasuke's view by pulling shut the curtain that divided the room, leaving him shut out from their interaction.

Whatever. He was tired anyway.

X_X

Sasuke reached over to silence his vibrating phone for what felt like the thousandth time that morning. He knew he probably shouldn't have agreed to it, but the money he was receiving was a huge stress relief. In all honesty it wasn't that bad, he just had to put up with constant phone calls and text messages and incessant questions on top of what he normally was expected in a sugar relationship. He had found that he could pass off not answering with the excuse that he was in class or taking an exam or something of that sort with good success so far. Finals were two weeks away so it's not like he was lying about being busy studying. Still he did have to meet with the man as agreed upon and well, it was nowhere near as enjoyable as it had been with Kakashi but Sasuke really wasn't in much of a place to complain when the blank envelope handed to him was stuffed with cash every time he saw Orochimaru. It was a double edged sword as those meetings were becoming very frequent.

He made sure to be clear that his priorities as a student came first and so far the older man had respected it. Orochimaru was also a well respected geneticist with many influential contacts that would greatly help Sasuke along they way to landing a well paying pharmaceutical job after he got his degree. Just another reason he was determined to grit and bear it for Uchiha only wished the obsessive tendencies would stop soon. He ignored yet another text message as he changed the song his phone was playing. It had been over a month since he had been discharged from the hospital and his stitches were long gone. A pink scar on his abdomen was the only indication he had almost died, according to the ER doctor. It was fine, he was working his way back up to reach his goals in whatever way he could. He was strong enough to do what he had to.

His phone lit up once more, this time a different number than the ones that had been pestering him all day. Sasuke considered it for a moment before answering.

"Hello"

_"Sasuke, I hope I'm not catching you at a bad time?" _

This guy had sent Sasuke a message a week ago, interested in his profile and what he had to offer. Sasuke figured it couldn't hurt to get a feel for how legit this Kabuto was. So far he seemed like a decent person, who maybe didn't make as much as his current relationship but definitely was well off. He also seemed to respect Sasuke's need for space which was a major plus.

"I was just studying. How have you been?" He tried to remember to be polite and professional, they both had something to offer each other and with any luck he could happily say goodbye to Orochimaru as soon as they made an agreement.

_"I'm good. I was wondering if you had plans for tonight, I want to take you out. I think it's time we talked about exactly what we can offer each other and see if it's something we can agree on." _The man's voice was smooth through the line, slightly reminiscent of Kakashi's tone when he used to call. Fuck.

"Sure. What time?"

They settled on a place and time. A car would be sent for Sasuke so he wouldn't have to drive, which was nice but slightly unsettling. Kakashi had sent cars for him all the time but he trusted Kakashi to see him home safely when everything was said and done. He could also just call a taxi should things go south, that shouldn't be much of an issue right? He dismissed the small doubt in the back of his mind, he was overreacting. He was nervous. He wanted this to go right so he could be in a stable financial state again without sacrificing his sanity.

He dressed in dark jeans and a button up shirt, a navy blue blazer completed the look. Classy but not too formal. He slid into his shoes and looked himself over in the mirror. He was confident in his outfit since he knew the dress code of the place he was going to anyway, one of Kakashi's favorite restaurants. He wondered if the staff would recognize him. It had been a good while since he was last there. He shook his head from that thought as his phone buzzed notifying him that the car was here for him.

The bartender did remember him, nice enough to offer a drink on the house as he waited at the bar for his potential to show up. He slowly sipped on his bourbon as he silently watched other people approach the bar and make their orders. It was a few minutes before Kabuto showed up, looking well put together and smartly dressed. Silver hair was almost an identical shade to the man he used to come with months ago. The host led them over to their table and for a moment Sasuke thought all would be well and his night would actually go without a hitch. Unfortunately that feeling only lasted a few seconds and was completely wiped away when he bumped into the worse person he could possibly think of to bump into right now.

"Sasuke?"

He stepped back and frowned, ready to throw an evil glare at whoever wasn't watching where they were going. He blinked up to find his mouth going dry at a familiar face staring back at him. Maybe he should have thought twice before suggesting this place, that was a poor decision on his part he supposed.

"Kak-... Mr. Hatake. Sorry, I didn't see you there." He cleared his throat and forced his face into a calm and controlled expression as soon as he saw a woman hanging off the man's arm.

"Dear?" She piped up, obviously concerned with the amount of staring her husband seemed to be doing.

Kakashi suddenly remembered his wife, breaking his eye contact with the Uchiha to turn to her. "Ah, this is Sasuke Uchiha. He's the younger brother of an important business associate of mine."

"Oh, Uchiha. Pleasure to meet you." Her tone changed to a cheerful one once she realized his surname meant he came from money.

If only she knew Kakashi had been fucking him senseless months ago, he was sure she wouldn't be saying that.

"Right. Well excuse me." He rolled his eyes and pushed past them eager to be out of the situation. He gestured over to Kabuto who seemed to be watching with interest before turning back and gave a neutral, "Have a nice evening, Mr. Hatake."

If Kabuto had any questions about the interaction he didn't voice them to which Sasuke was grateful. They sat out of sight from the Hatakes and the Uchiha was determined to put it from his mind. He ordered his food and excused himself to the restroom before the meal came or any "business" conversation started. He needed a minute to just make sure he was composed. He was going to be rid of Orochimaru soon and finally be able to breathe without his phone sounding off every second. Maybe the sex would be enjoyable again. He really hoped so. He leaned against the sink and stared at his reflection shortly after splashing some water on his face. He wouldn't let running into an ex mess with his night. He stood up straight reflexively when the door opened and he recognized the person who walked in but relaxed when it processed that it wasn't Kakashi. They stared at each other for a moment before Hinata's cousin, the rude ass doctor, made his way into the room and Sasuke abruptly left before he had to be forced into another awkward situation tonight.

The food arrived and Sasuke ordered a water when he saw a glass of wine already poured for him. Thanks to his nerves earlier he was thirsty and the thought of downing wine in front of a potential would probably give the wrong idea. They ate calmly, talking a bit more about Kabuto's job, Sasuke's degree and various other things about life and things they had in common. Once they were mostly done the older man frowned and gestured to Sasuke's wine glass.

"I'm sorry if I assumed you liked wine. I can order something else for you if you'd prefer?"

He didn't even realized he hadn't taken a sip, that was rude. "No, sorry. I'm fine with wine. I was just really thirsty earlier and I didnt want to come off wrong if I drank most of the bottle."

He lifted the glass to his lips and drank. It was one of the best he had ever tasted. Sasuke watched Kabuto smile as he took another deep sip.

"Good. Now about business." the older man swirled the dark liquid around his glass as he spoke. "I have it understood you have many goals in your life, but I also have come to the realization that you don't exactly come from nothing."

"What do you mean by that?" He had a feeling he knew where this was going.

"Well your last name sort of gave it away." An ugly smirk found its way onto Kabuto's face. "Now don't take this the wrong way, you are ambitious. That's a trait I greatly admire about you and I can easily see why he does too. At first I was so confused, why would he desperately chase after you? I didn't see it as much of a threat before, you didn't give him the slightest inkling of interest after your initial meeting with him. I brushed it off, but then you came back and all he wants now is you."

Sasuke began feeling light headed, this was not going at all like he planned. "What are you talking about?"

"You come from money, you couldn't possibly need more. You didn't seem interested in him sexually so that wasn't it either. Perhaps it was your career goals that made you seek him out, but even then with your last name you could easily demand any job you ever wanted. You don't know what it is to sacrifice so much to become successful. You've probably never had to work hard for anything in your life. I'm sure your parents pay for everything you own anyway. Do you get off playing a game of how much you can string people like him along? You don't deserve Orochimaru's affection." The older man's kept his voice calm and light, almost as if he was discussing the weather instead of picking apart Sasuke's life.

He opened his mouth to give this fuckwad a piece of his mind but he realized that the table before him looked like it was tilted. He looked around him at the restaurant and couldn't figure out why everything was moving so slowly. The room was beginning to spin, fading in and out, disorienting. It was hard to focus on the man across from him anymore. What the fuck?

"I understand he is enraptured by your charm and drive, but you are not what he needs. I am the only one for him. I have always been the only one for him." Kabuto finished the wine in his glass and pointedly set it down.

The wine! Sasuke never saw the wine get poured, it was already there when he came back from the restroom. His glass must have been drugged, what a stupid careless mistake. He knew better than that. What the hell was he going to do now? He was in a busy restaurant but unable to say anything loudly. He made an attempt to stand but Kabuto swiftly caught him before he stumbled enough to grab anyone's attention. His arm was hoisted around Kabuto and quickly slipped away from the table back into the now packed bar area. Nobody would notice with this many bodies pressed together and with the amount of alcohol in everyone's system.

They were almost to the door when the bartender ran into them, empty pint glasses in his hands. "Sir? Are you ok?"

Sasuke tried so hard to speak, to ask for help, to say he was in trouble but only soft groans escaped his mouth as his body sagged against the man propping him up.

"He's seemed to have a bit too much to drink. I'm going to take him home." Kabuto was smooth, convincing, a complete psychopath.

Panic rose in his chest as he felt the chilly night air on his face. Kabuto had managed to get him outside. It was hard to figure out what was happening now, he was fighting as best he could against letting himself blackout. There was a hard surface now at his back and the stench of a dumpster wafted around. An alley maybe? Was he really going to die in an alley? If he had known this he would have been more than ok with dying in a library a few weeks ago instead.

Pain blossomed in his stomach. It was a different feeling from his appendix, piercing, twisting and deep. His body wanted to curl in on itself by instinct, to try and protect whatever it could but he was held back to the wall with a firm crushing hand on his neck. His body wasn't responding when he told it to move.

"He has always liked your eyes." a distorted voice played somewhere. Sasuke guessed it was Kabuto. It was hard to make sense of anything anymore.

Another shot of pain, this time in his left eye. A sob escaped him at the moment before the drug dulled much else of any bodily sensation. Maybe he should have called Itachi when he was in the hospital a few weeks ago. Maybe he should have asked Shikamaru for advice one more time, even if it was just an excuse to sit in the diner and kill time in silence with a good friend. Maybe he should have tried to tell Kakashi that he really did miss him and even though it was becoming harder to not think about him, Sasuke hoped life was treating him good, hoped he was happy. Maybe.

He let the darkness take him this time.

X_X

There was an incredibly annoying beep that persisted somewhere close by. It didn't help the throbbing pain that banged in his head. There were some vague voices but he couldn't figure out what they were saying. He let himself fall back asleep, he didn't care too much about them anyway.

The machine was still beeping the next time he woke up. His body felt heavy and his mouth was dry. He was only able to open one eye for some reason, faintly blinking as his vision adjusted. It was dark, night time maybe? He let his gaze wander around the hospital room before it set on a familiar figure by the side of his bed. Itachi propped up against the wall, sleeping in what must be an uncomfortable position. Dark circles were apparent under his brothers eyes. He must have not been able to sleep well for a long while.

He wondered how he got here, alive in this bed instead of dead in a dumpster. He wondered who called Itachi here, he hadn't given any contacts last time he was hospitalized. He wondered what day it was, how long had he been out? Probably a while if his brother looked like he hadn't slept well in days. He lightly lifted his hand to see why he was unable to open his left eye. His fingers traced the bandage that had been placed over it. Well, that was unfortunate. Hopefully he hadn't lost his his vision in that eye entirely.

He looked over at the table to his other side. A small vase of flowers sat with a card addressed to Sasuke, but that was not the thing that held his attention. Next to that was a small paper crane, folded precisely in red and gold patterned paper. How did that get there? The only person he knew who did origami would have been discharged from the hospital weeks ago. Even if she was still here how would she know he was back?

He brought himself to turn his attention back over to his brother, guilt blossoming in his chest as he took in that all too familiar worn out look. He remembered the first time he noticed Itachi with same exhaustion from worry on his face years ago when his parents had found out he was gay. After all the yelling looks of disgust from his mother and father was done Itachi was called in and asked if he had anything to say to Sasuke. The fear that swelled in Sasuke's thirteen year old chest when his brother turned to him was next to unbearable. His parents could say what they wanted, they could yell in either language they chose, they didn't matter anyway. He spared no tears for their cruel words. But Itachi, Itachi's words were more precious than gold.

"Sasuke, you are my brother and nothing will change that. I will always be here for you."

Just like that. Itachi stood and guided Sasuke up to his room, leaving their gasping mother and flustered father downstairs. Sasuke was allowed to sleep in his bed that night, just like when they were little kids. He didn't know what to say, he had been so strong and brave before his parents. He had to be. Itachi poked his forehead as they lay wrapped up in warm blankets, and that was all it took for Sasuke's wall to crumble that night as the tears poured out.

"I'm sorry, Itachi"

Afterwards, that look of worry and exhaustion seemed to find permanent residence in Itachi even as he slept. It haunts him to this day. Sasuke knew that was his fault. He shouldn't be making his brother worry even more.

He reached out, pressing the soft pad of his index finger to his brothers cheek and poked him gently. His brother stirred immediately, eyes widening as he seemed to realize Sasuke was awake. Before he could say anything Sasuke shifted himself as best as he could despite his injuries to one side of the tiny hospital bed and silently motioned for Itachi to join him. He tried his best as he could to plead with just one eye in the dark but it seemed to work. It was rare for Sasuke to be this sentimental and his brother knew that as well. The taller man simply sighed in amusement before laying himself as best he could in the cramped space. Just like when they were kids.

It was quiet. Itachi simply watched as Sasuke absently played with the blanket, the material was soft between his hands. He didn't know what to say. No, that was a lie. It didn't matter what he said. He was afraid to speak, afraid to break whatever it was that has been holding him together for so long. Afraid of having to pick himself back up and putting himself back together again. He had to stay strong, be strong so Itachi wouldn't worry.

Two fingers poked his forehead, bringing his attention back up to his brothers face. Just like when they were kids.

Sasuke trembled, throat going dry and his good eye beginning to water. "I'm sorry, Itachi."

Sasuke broke.

X_X

His brother stayed on the bed with him the rest of the night. Itachi hadn't said much, just let Sasuke unravel in his arms while the rest of the world slept. The nurse unfortunately broke the spell, whatever magic Itachi had that could make the younger Uchiha feel safe enough to be vulnerable. She woke them up with her incessant chatter and bright smiling face, Sasuke contemplated murder for a solid fifteen minutes after that.

The morning was eventful, doctors and hospital staff trudged in and out running tests and delivering medicine and prodding him and poking him and asking him to rate his pain on a scale of one to ten. Thankfully they were done by mid afternoon and Sasuke almost wished he hadn't woken up from surgery just yet.

"So... what happened to me?

It was just them again, he didn't want to hear it from the nurses or doctors. He needed Itachi to tell him, no judgments or pity, just the truth.

"You were drugged and attacked by a complete lunatic." Itachi's voice was level.

"I remember that much." Sasuke took a deep breath before continuing. "How did I end up here instead of, well... dead?"

His brother frowned at that question, "That's a loaded question and the story brings up questions on my end for you as well. Are you prepared for that?"

"Yes." No. He was not prepared for his older brother to know anything about why he was there that night.

"Thankfully the bartender recognized you and knew something wasn't right when you left with that man. He said you and Kakashi Hatake used to frequent the place together but Mr. Hatake was having dinner with his wife. He went up to him anyway and explained what he saw and they were able to find you in time. They seemed to have scared off your attacker and the bartender ran back to get help. Luckily a doctor was having dinner there that night as well and rushed to keep you from bleeding out while the ambulance got there."

Sasuke remained silent as he let the story sink in. He should not be alive right now. Thank his damned lucky stars.

"Sasuke, what were you doing with that man?"

Oh, right into it then? He was not ready for this. "I was on a date with him." True enough.

Itachi raised one brow slowly, an indication he didn't fully believe that. "And how did you meet this date of yours?"

Itachi was really trying to drag it out of him,"...Online." Also true.

Oh, there was that face. The one he made when he knew Sasuke was hiding something from him. "Is there a reason you went on a date with a man older than me?"

Fuck, how did he know that? The question may as well have been rhetorical. Itachi was ten years older than him, he fucking knew what men that age were doing with people Sasuke's age. "He seemed like a nice guy. Do you know how frustrating it is to date people my age? All they want is to party and sleep around." That was also not technically a lie, one of the main reasons he didn't really date around with other college age students.

"Right. Then why did the bartender say you and Mr. Hatake were usually there together?"

Shit. How was he going to get out of this one?

"Mr. Uchiha? The doctor needs to have you fill out some paperwork as the patient's emergency contact and next of kin." The chipper nurse practically bounced into the room.

Saving grace in the form of an angel. Glory and hallelujah. He took back every thought he had about strangling the woman that morning.

"We are continuing this conversation when I get back." Itachi clipped as he stood to follow the woman out of the room.

Hopefully that wouldn't be for a while. Thankfully the divine forces seemed to take pity on his poor soul. Itachi was gone for awhile. It allowed perfect timing for a certain visitor to see Sasuke without interference.

"That was a very reckless thing of you to do."

"Are you saying getting drugged was my fault? Just because I'm a sugar baby doesn't give him the right to do whatever he wants to me." The Uchiha was not going to let anyone blame him for the actions of a psycho even if that same guilty phrase kept replaying itself in the back of his mind over and over again.

"That's not what I meant." Kakashi let the argument drop as silence filled the air between them. It wasn't one he could win anyway. "The doctor that saved you said you were in the hospital a few weeks ago but didn't give anyone's name as an emergency contact. If you needed help then why didn't you ask?"

"Who was I supposed to call? I sure as hell couldn't call you. You know I couldn't ask my parents either." He was too tired to have this conversation right now.

Kakashi didn't skip a beat as he responded to that excuse, "What about Itachi then?"

"I can't keep relying on my family and their money to save me." The older man knew exactly how he felt about his family, Sasuke shouldn't have to argue about this with him.

"Is your pride really worth risking your life?"

He sighed defeatedly, "My pride is all I have at this point, Kakashi."

"Don't say that. It's not true."

Sasuke frowned back at him and let his gaze fall to his hands that rested in his lap. Funny, last time he was in a hospital he had wished to contact Kakashi. Now that he had him here he thought it would be best if the man left. He already felt like shit in just about every way possible. He didn't need to be reminded that his life had become a massive trash heap on fire. He didn't feel like fighting about this anymore.

"I hear that I owe you my thanks. I'd probably be dead if you and the bartender didn't find me in time."

That seemed to work, Kakashi let the previous argument drop for now as he responded, "Maybe, but you'd be dead if there hadn't been a doctor in the restaurant at that time. You are one lucky kid, you know that?"

"Doesn't feel like it most of the time." He almost laughed as he said that. A statement so sad it was funny.

"Yeah, life sucks that way."

"I'm sorry about all the trouble that was caused with your wife and all that." The Uchiha fiddled lightly with the blanket. He had never really given his sympathy to Kakashi.

The tall figure rolled his eyes, "Nothing that couldn't be fixed with empty promises and money."

"You're a terrible person."

"She's terrible for agreeing to marry me just for my money so that makes us two of a kind. A perfect match."

"Well then, I'm glad you two deserve each other." Sasuke sassed.

Kakashi snorted in amusement at that before a fond look found its way onto his face, "Thank you for all your honesty. I think that's probably the thing that made me decide to cheat on my wife in the first place. She pretends like I don't know she's only in this for the social status it gives her family and the size of my wallet. She doesnt love me, she cheats on me just the same, the only reason it upset her was that I was spending on someone that wasn't her. She will never be upfront about the fact that she married me for my money. It aggravates me to no end. You on the other hand, you didn't ever play those games with me."

Sasuke shrugged lightly, "Anyone who says money doesn't affect their decisions is an idiot. I did it for the money but I won't lie when I say after a while I stayed in it just because of you. The money became a convenient and well needed plus."

"Glad to hear you felt the same." The older man smiled to himself.

"I never had to say it, you always knew."

The silver haired man sighed deeply, "Your brother is going to kill me."

Sasuke clicked his tongue in annoyance, "Don't be ridiculous." That statement was probably true though. Itachi would be livid when he found out.

Kakashi hummed in thought, "Look, we can't go back to how things were but you can call me if you really need some help or if you just need to talk. I care about you."

He watched his ex stand and lean in to plant a soft kiss onto his forehead before making his way to the door.

"Feel better." The sentiment was soft like the expression on Kakashi's face.

"Yeah"

X_X

"No, you have to fold it diagonally." The soft whisper like voice guided as they folded paper together.

"Oh, and then perpendicular to each other?" Sasuke pressed down on the fold to create a crisp crease.

"Yes." She showed him slowly how to fold the paper into itself to create a waterbomb base.

Her company was nice. A much needed break from tests and questions and hard conversations with his brother and ex. Of course her cousin had been the doctor in the restaurant that night that kept him from meeting an early end. Sasuke had yet to see him, but she came by often enough to say hello and bring something to help take his mind off everything that was happening in his life right now. It was nice to be able to actually talk to her this time around instead of passing notes back and forth. Her voice was permanently just barely a whisper but that was ok. Sasuke could hear her just fine.

Her phone lit up as a notification buzzed. "My cousin is on his lunch break, I guess this is it for today."

"Hn. Thank you for stopping by."

"Let me know if you ever need a friend to talk to. No judgements." She handed him a folded flower as she stood to leave.

He opened up the folds to reveal her phone number written carefully in ink. He added it to his contacts after a moment of thought. Maybe another friend wouldn't be so bad.

X_X

He was so behind in his school work. It would be a miracle if he could catch up enough and pass his make up finals the professors were so gracious to allow him to take. He could do it though, he had to. There was nothing else he could do but at least see this semester through. His education had always been his main goal and he'd be damned if he failed any of his classes. It also helped his concentration that his phone was no longer sounding off every five minutes unlike before this whole ordeal began.

That had been a rough patch of conversations. From cutting ties with Orochimaru to having to tell his brother the truth of how he had been supporting himself and everything in between that had to do with the fact that Kabuto managed to skip town and the police being unable to do anything more. He really just wanted life to stop beating him while he was down.

He looked down at the blur of letters in front of him and cursed. He needed a break. he'd been staring at notes and books for so long the words began to jumble and no longer made any sense. He stood and made his way into his brothers kitchen. Staying with Itachi hadn't been so bad, but he would be lying if he said he didn't feel the least bit guilty. This was all his fault, his brother shouldn't be having to take care of him like this. He hated asking for help cleaning his wounds properly and he couldn't lift or bend over much. He felt pathetic having Itachi do things for him. His eye was still healing and thankfully the sutures in his abdomen would be gone soon. He'd have a lovely second scar on his body in the end. All in all he might have to live being partially blind in one eye but he figured that was his penance for creating this mess in the first place.

A voice down the hall caught Sasuke's attention. It sounded like Itachi was upset, voice slightly raised and tense enough that he could tell his brother was just on the edge of losing his shit. He silently got closer to the study peeking through the door that was open just a crack.

"How could you take advantage of my brother like that?"

Itachi was on the phone and Sasuke had a pretty good idea who he was talking to. He desperately wished he could hear what the man on the other end of the line was saying. If anything Sasuke had been the one taking advantage of Kakashi, profiting on his money and poor marital relationship for his own personal gain. He pressed himself closer to the wall straining to hear Itachi's side of the conversation.

"Your disaster of a marriage is no excuse for any of this."

Silence, whatever the response to that was Sasuke couldn't tell.

"I understand, he's an adult and is capable of making his own decisions but he deserves better than all of this." Footsteps sounded out, Itachi was pacing now. Back and forth across the wooden floors of his study with his phone pressed against his ear.

"I want the truth Kakashi, how do you really feel about him?" He heard his brother stop for a moment and sighed heavily, before continuing to walk aimlessly around his desk.

"I see. Well, thank you for looking out for him and supporting him in ways I couldn't, but I think it's best if you stayed away for a while. Let him figure things out in his own time. He doesn't need to be dealing with all of this right now. You certainly have your own issues to resolve."

Sasuke slowly got up, he'd heard enough of Itachi fretting over him. He felt very claustrophobic all of a sudden, like the walls of his brothers apartment were not tall enough for him to breathe properly. He grabbed his phone and shoes and silently slipped out the door before Itachi could realize he was gone. Fresh air would do him some good anyway.

He walked across the street to the park and claimed one of the lonely swings in the playground. What a fucking mess. A majority of his life he'd been pushing down any inkling of emotion in him. He denied himself the right to connect to people that way, especially in the kind of way he had chose to support himself. Attachments were dangerous things, they held you back and made you do stupid things. He couldn't escape it now, no matter how hard he tried to direct all his energy to school, Kakashi somehow wormed his way into Sasuke's passing thoughts. He was so tired of it. He just wanted it to stop.

A buzzing in his pocket brought him back to reality. Sasuke stared at the screen in his hands as he gently rocked back and forth.

**Itachi: Where did you go?**

**Sasuke: Park. Needed some fresh air.**

**Itachi: Everything ok?**

**Sasuke: Fine.**

He did not want to talk to his brother about how annoyed he was at himself for being hung up on Kakashi. Having to admit what he was doing with Kakashi for two years was enough of a difficult conversation to have to go through. Itachi must have been so disappointed in him and even though he didn't understand what was so disappointing about honest sex work he couldn't bear to talk to Itachi about it anymore than he had to and upset things even further. Arguing was not going to make things better.

He stared at his phone a while longer, debating what he should so. Shika was out of the country on holiday break right now so he would be hard to get a hold of. Calling Kakashi didn't feel like the right move either. He scrolled through his small contact list before finally selecting the only other person who might be understanding about all this. It would be fine, she was rather kind and quiet in the first place. She seemed like someone he could confide in, someone he could trust.

She didn't live too far away, which was not surprising given the fact that her cousin was a rich doctor and Itachi practically lived in the Ritz.

"Do you love him?"

That question was a bit of a surprise, "It's not as simple as that."

Hinata looked over curiously, "Well, why not?"

"Loving someone doesn't solve anything." Your bitterness is showing Sasuke, but he wasn't wrong.

"No, but it's a good guide to what you should do if you ever want to be happy in life." She said it as gentle as ever but the words may as well have been a bitch slap.

I mean, deep down he did want to be happy, "How are you so optimistic?"

"It's a gift. Now, tell me. What's he like?"

Sasuke grumbled, "He's fucking perfect."

"Nobody's perfect." She gave him a teasing smile.

"He's as close to perfect for me as it will ever get. He's always been good to me, he respects me and listens to my opinions. He challenges me to think differently. He supports my dreams and small successes. He could lose all his financial wealth, status and everything that people annoyingly clamor after and I would still want to be by his side." He may as well sew his bleeding heart to his sleeve. Why was he admitting all of this again?

"Then it seems you already know how you feel, you're just hesitant to take any action on it." Hinta bluntly stated.

"Of course I'm hesitant. It's a bit of an unusual relationship with a taboo beginning. How do you measure whether someone is worth taking a risk for?" Sasuke was not really excited about the possibility of being rejected by Kakashi or by his brother and potentially society should things work out.

She laughed quietly, "I have quite a bit of experience when it comes to unusual and taboo relationships. So take my word for it, Sasuke. If you need to take some time for yourself to figure things out that's ok but in the end you are both consenting adults who care about each other. Don't worry about anyone else. Just be with each other if that's what makes you happy."

She had a point. In the end society would always have something to say regardless of what he did. He had an eerie feeling that Shika would greatly approve of her advice. "What if he doesn't feel the same?"

"Then you call me and I'll bring over some take out and ice cream and we'll eat your feelings together while watching horror movies."

He nodded lightly. Alright time for a topic change, "So you're an expert on out of the ordinary relationships then?"

She blushed, "Something like that."

"Your cousin?" He let the question drop lightly, a simple yes or no that she could exit out of and end the conversation if she didn't feel like talking about it.

"My cousin." She confirmed.

It was silent for a moment, maybe she felt like she was being judged? "You both look happy together. I'm glad for you."

She exhaled a breath she must have been holding in before smiling up at Sasuke. "Thank you." She sighed and slowly twisted herself around in the swing. "Not many people know since it's hard to explain and even harder to determine if it's someone who can be trusted to not judge even if they aren't supportive."

"I can imagine. Thank you for trusting me." Sasuke watched her spin back the opposite way, untangling the chains.

"Of course. Our situation is similar even though it's different."

Sasuke thought for a moment, "Will he be upset that you've told me?"

She smiled mischievously, "Technically you guessed it, but no. We've been through a lot together. He's not one to trust others easily but he does trust me and my judgement. He always has."

"Sounds like you've got the most important part of a relationship down. Most 'normal' couples can't even figure that out."

X_X

Sasuke nervously fiddled with the invitation in his hand. It had been over a year since they had seen each other. They would message sporadically but nothing more than a simple greeting and well wishes really. He was sure Itachi made a strong impression and Kakashi was respecting the fact that he should give Sasuke space. Which in reality it was probably a good idea. He was able to focus on finishing up school and in a few weeks he would be walking across the stage, receiving his diploma and begin working as a research assistant for a prestigious pharmaceutical company. His physical wounds long since healed and now another set of scars on his body and face. His emotional wounds were well, a work in progress but progress nonetheless.

He pushed the doorbell and hoped to god his wife would not be the one to answer. A year was a long time but Sasuke was sure now, no doubt about it. He had changed through the course of a year, become more certain. Finally learned how to accept help from those he trusted and dispute his ever constant stubbornness, he had learned a great deal about humility during his recovery. Now he was here, standing at the door and anxious as hell but he had put it off long enough and was ready for whatever would come next. He was prepared to take the rejection with dignity and try his hardest to move on for now without letting it turn him too sour.

"I'll be graduating in next month."

Kakashi stood at the doorstep of his impressively large estate. "Oh, congratulations Sasuke. I'm glad to hear you've been able to reach your goals."

"Yes, well I didn't come all this way just to hear you say congratulations. I am inviting you to my graduation." Sasuke shoved the envelope into Kakashi's hands.

The older man stared at the card for a moment before sighing, "Sasuke, I-"

That sounded like it was going downhill fast. The Uchiha cut him off before he could shoot him down. "Look, I understand and you don't have to go if you don't want to and you might not feel the same way. That's perfectly fine, but I came here to let you know, I want you there. I want you to be present at this important accomplishment in my life. I don't give a shit what my brother says or what your wife says or what anyone else says, you are important to me. I care about you and I want you in my life."

"Ex-wife"

"What?" Huh? Here Sasuke was pouring his heart out and this guy wants to bring up someone's ex wife. Really?

"It's ex-wife now actually." Kakashi clarified.

"Oh" As in Kakashi's ex wife, yes that makes more sense to the context. Shit, he actually divorced her? That couldn't have been simple in any shape way or form. That woman would have fought tooth and nail for at least half his wealth.

"Sasuke"

The Uchiha snapped back to reality, "Yeah?"

"I'm really glad you came to see me and thank you for always being honest with me."

"Oh. Yeah, of course." And here comes the rejection.

"I'll be there."

"Huh?" That was not the next thing he expected Kakashi to say.

"Your graduation. I'll be there."

"Oh, ok. Great." What the fuck?

Kakashi looked nervous, Sasuke knew he was hesitant about whatever he wanted to really say. Maybe he didn't want to hurt Sasuke's feelings with how he didnt quire reciprocate what Sasuke was hoping for. Well, he was a goddamned adult. If Kakashi couldn't just be honest with him in the same way Sasuke was being then maybe it wasn't worth the effort in the first place.

He was about to open his mouth and tell Kakashi to spit it out when he was caught off guard by the man's voice.

"Do you want to come inside?" Kakashi's face looked...hopeful.

Sasuke blinked for a moment trying to figure out just where this was going. He blankly nodded and followed the older man through the door and into the ridiculously beautiful house. Kakashi led them into the kitchen and gestured for Sasuke to take a seat at the bar.

"I missed you. So many times I wanted to reach out and talk with you, let you know how proud I was that you were focusing on school and let you know how I was doing."

"Why didn't you?" The Uchiha knew why though.

"Ah, your brother made it very clear you needed space. I also didn't want to test if he would follow through on his also need to focus on your classes."

Sasuke gave a frustrated sigh, "I've told him to leave you alone."

"He's just protecting you. His heart is in the right place."

"I don't need to be protected from you. He knows that." Annoyingly enough Itachi never seemed to get the message.

"I'm afraid to ask but exactly how much did you tell him?"

"Itachi? Well, the truth. You were always good to me, never pressured me to do anything, and that I don't regret ever being with you." Pure honesty tended to work best with an older brother who could smell your lies and half truths a mile away.

There was a contemplative silence between them, almost as if the response to that statement was unsure.

"Did you want to go back to our old agreement?" Kakashi walked over to the Uchiha and pulled out his wallet.

Sasuke's heart fell to his stomach and a scowl set into place in a matter of seconds. He snatched the wallet and cash out of the man's hands and chucked it across the room. Silver brows quirked up in amusement as the younger man fisted his hands in the front of Kakashi's shirt.

"Stupid old man. I don't want your money." He expression set in a hard stare, grips tightening around the soft cotton stretched between his fingers. "I just want you."

A chuckle escaped as hands found their way onto hips. "I know, I was joking. I almost forgot how demanding you can be."

"If I remember correctly, you liked it when I was demanding."

Kakashi smiled fondly before becoming serious, "I- I told her, about you. About us being together and how I felt. I couldn't be married to her anymore when the only person on my mind the entire time was you."

"Did she give you hell for it?" He'd be surprised if she didn't.

"Something like that. But she had fun making a huge scandal of it."

Yeah that sounds about right. It must have been rough no matter how lightly Kakashi tried to play it off. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be. I'm the one who's sorry. I never should have ended it so quickly with you when she found out. I should have been honest instead of cheating on her in the first place even though she's cheated on me more times that I can count. But for the first time since our families set us up and I was basically forced to marry her, I feel like I can breathe. In not so many words, she told to shove it. She's still a little bitter."

Being this close in range to each other was familiar and warm and oh so right.

"Hn. You're turning soft old man." It wasn't like they both spoke about their emotions so freely.

"Hardly. I'm just glad because I want you in my life too."

In that small moment Sasuke felt his breath catch. He thought back to what Hinata said to him almost a year ago. Sasuke eagerly closed the space between them. Maybe, just maybe things would turn out alright after all.


End file.
